Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
