So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
nutella sex= disaster
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
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