he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
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