There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
