I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
