You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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