Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
