Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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