Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Randomize
