I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
God, you're like boner-b-gone
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
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