Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
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