can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
