i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
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