You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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