Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
