Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
