the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Randomize
