It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
