All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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