you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
