So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
