I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
