we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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