still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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