good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
