Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
