i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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