It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize
