dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
