it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
