I'm sorry my penis didn't work
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
