She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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