Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
my poor anus
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize