Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
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