the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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