i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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