He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize