I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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