those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize
