I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
