If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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