i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
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