sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
You're completely useless in the revolution.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
