I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
