There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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