How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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