I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
