she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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