i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
