summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
