Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
