I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
